I’d say that you can’t make this stuff up, except that Lord Christopher Monckton has, indeed, fabricated nearly every aspect of his life in order to get a putrid seat in the climate change denier clown car. But Monckton, who is afforded so much credibility by right wing deniers here in the US, and Climate Depot’s Marc Morano, have yanked too hard on their leashes recently and may be falling out of favor with their evil overlords. There is increasing message board and website “chatter” that their dirty attacks on female climate scientists, along with incessant bullying of the Pope (ahead of his encyclical about climate change) have turned off a large segment of their supporters.
If you’re wondering why anyone would listen to Christopher Monckton, the reasons are disappointingly simplistic. Thanks entirely to a wonky English accent, an outsized ego, lots of eye-bulging bluster, and a dubious (inherited) title, this whinging wanker and utter fake has conned the likes of James “Snowball Thrower” Inhofe (R-Oklahoma), Devin Nunes (R-California), and Jim Sensenbrenner (R-Wisconsin), to name just a few. Monckton, who married in middle age and is childless, but who is, curiously, a ranting homophobe (methinks this lady doth protest too much) is NOT a scientist, NOT an intellect of any significance, and, definitely NOT qualified to steer public policy or debate about much of anything, except how to be a punter. And yet, for the reasons above, he occasionally finds himself in front of an audience of dolts (such as attendees at the upcoming Heritage Institute AGW deniers circle jerk) who, thinking so little of their own intellect that they gladly listen to Monckton’s drivel. Thankfully, he may be wearing out his welcome here in the US, so hopefully we can silence this miserable git.
Here are just some of Monckton’s dubious claims and accomplishments:
1) Monckton has claimed for several years that he has found a cure for AIDS, multiple sclerosis, the common cold, the flu, prion-related diseases (like Mad Cow), herpes…literally 2/3 of all known illnesses. When asked about this incredible achievement, he will then go on to say that he is in the process of patenting his miraculous “cure.” The reality is that he begins the application process, does not pay the fee, nor does he ever finish the paperwork, which then causes the patent application to ultimately expire. This allows him to continue making the (false) claim that he’s patenting SOMETHING. He has done this, at least, for the years 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012 and 2013;
2) He says that NASA crashed its own satellite because the data, if allowed to exist, would have shown that climate change was not actually happening;
3) He brags that he is a co-recipient of the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize just because he wrote a comment to the UN IPCC regarding their published report and so (in his addled brain), he thinks that this that means he shares the Nobel prize with Al Gore et al, which is nonsense. When his back is up against the wall, he admits that he never received a Nobel prize for anything (Stockholm does not yet hand out a Daft Cow Award. If and when they do, I nominate Christopher Monckton). Unfortunately, American and Australian climate skeptics keep that huge myth alive and well on the internet;
4) He has maintained for years that he’s a member of the UK House of Lords. Even pathetically mimicking their insignia and circulating it as his own. When they demand that he knock it off, he changes his “logo” ever so slightly, then changes it back to something appearing to look just like a House of Lords crest when they divert their attention elsewhere. Doesn’t this sound like a child’s game of hide and seek? The Clerk of the Parliaments has to continually demand that he stop saying he is at all affiliated with them, but every time they “look away,” he starts babbling on about it again. Here is one of his attempts to mimic a House of Lords insignia, and use it as his own (note the sarcasm in the caption):
5) The only reason that he can claim any sort of royal title is that his grandfather, politician William Monckton was gifted with a dubious, bullshit title in 1957 even though rumors of him actually conspiring with the Soviets swirled for decades. Here is rarely seen footage from November 1941 of Walter Monckton (he’s wearing dark-rimmed glasses) speaking with American diplomat Laurence Steinhardt. They are joined by Soviet Foreign Minister Maxim Litvinov (he’s standing just inside the airplane door) at a British airfield:
There were several occasions where Monckton and Litvinov were together and their whereabouts mysteriously became unknown, prompting various news articles speculating about what had happened to them. Regardless of whether Walter Monckton deserved to be made a “Lord,” or not, Christopher Monckton simply inherited the title due to no accomplishment of his own. Such titles have been, and continue to be, handed out like Cracker Jack prizes, and can even be bought online, and yet they manage to dazzle Americans who desperately idolize even the appearance of British royalty. And in the case of the Monckton lineage, the title is further sullied and thus even less noteworthy. Those Americans who feel the need to hobnob with British toffs can’t understand that respecting an utter fool makes them appear even more simple minded;
6) Monckton claims to be an expert reviewer for the IPCC. They, of course, have no such title. If people want to volunteer to help out, they are generally welcome to do so. In fact, my dog, Daisy May has recently offered her services. I highly anticipate her similarly riveting review!
7) Monckton would be politely ignored, as someone might be inclined to do when dealing with a disturbed person, except that he seems to have found an audience in the US made up of those even less intelligent than he is, and who are more than willing to be snowed by a fancy accent and loads of unsubstantiated moxie. His science is beyond nutty, even when he publishes something while hanging on the coattails of celebrated fossil fuel shill Willie Soon. And, again, it might be almost comical except that this twisted, lying sack of shriveled bollocks gets face time with similarly addled elected officials in the US government. For more of Monckton’s ranting, crazed scientific proclamations, please see Skeptical Science’s write up about him.
And Monckton is, like all weak and scared bullies, more than ready to dish it out, but when he finds himself on the receiving end of any type of criticism or personal attacks (something he gladly does at the drop of a hat), he goes running to mum and dad, threatening all sorts of legal retribution and hellfire. Indeed, even I received a threatening message from his secretary or (more than likely) from Monckton himself pretending to have a secretary. Below is a message from Monckton’s “secretary” which was prompted by my lumping him in with the other deniers responsible for the two Dutch Arctic researchers (Cornelissen and de Roo) deaths in the Arctic due to thinning ice. My response to him is underneath Rowlatt’s email:
Christopher Monckton is a mean, badgering, vindictive little man. For even more about this crook, please see his “rap sheet” at Climate Asylum.
In the real world, he would be immediately dismissed as a moron and a clown. In the realm of the climate crisis, he is actually dangerous as he attempts to impede appropriate action to counter climate change while stifling proper scientific discourse. As such, he bears the responsibility for all the misery, past, present and future, that is heaped upon our natural world.